Chapter 22

NDEs and God's Love for the Unsaved

Why Jesus Is Compassionate Before Final Death

The Puzzle That Troubles Many Christians

Here is something that bothers a lot of sincere Christians. People who have near-death experiences — including atheists, people living in open rebellion against God, non-Christians of every kind — overwhelmingly describe encountering a divine being of staggering, unconditional love. Not anger. Not condemnation. Not fire and brimstone. Love. Powerful, personal, all-encompassing love. A love so intense that NDErs regularly say nothing in their entire earthly lives even comes close to matching it.

And this raises an obvious question: shouldn't God be angry at sinners? Shouldn't He confront the unbeliever about their unbelief? If the Bible teaches that there is a coming judgment — and it clearly does — then shouldn't people who are living apart from God encounter judgment when they cross the threshold of death, rather than a warm embrace?

I understand why this is troubling. The concern is sincere and it deserves a careful, honest answer. If we take the Bible seriously — and I do — then we need to explain why the God encountered in NDEs seems so consistently loving, even toward people who, by any reasonable measure, are not living in obedience to Him. Does this mean judgment is not real? Does it mean all roads lead to heaven? Does it undermine the seriousness of sin?

I believe the answer to all three questions is no. In this chapter, I want to show that God's overwhelmingly loving demeanor toward sinners in NDEs is not evidence against the Bible's teaching on judgment. It is not a reason to embrace universalism. And it is not a contradiction of historic Christian theology. In fact, I believe it is exactly what we should expect from the God revealed in the Gospels — given one critically important fact: an NDE is not the person's final death.

The Data: What NDErs Actually Report

Before we can explain the phenomenon, we need to see it clearly. The research is remarkably consistent on this point. Across decades of studies, across multiple countries and cultures, NDErs describe encountering a divine being — usually identified as God, a being of light, or Jesus — whose defining characteristic is love.

Jeffrey Long's landmark God Study analyzed 420 consecutive qualifying NDEs submitted to the Near-Death Experience Research Foundation (NDERF). When asked whether they encountered any specific awareness regarding love during their experience, 58.1 percent answered "yes," with an additional 9.5 percent answering "uncertain."¹ Long found that God in NDEs is consistently described as "profoundly loving," with that love characterized as "enormous, unconditional, and totally accepting."² What theologians call the omnibenevolence of God — His unlimited, infinite grace and charity — is what NDErs encounter most powerfully.³

J. Steve Miller, in his systematic study of consecutively uploaded NDEs on the NDERF website, found the same pattern. He noted that NDErs consistently describe a selfless, giving, unconditional love — a love that matches the Greek concept of agapē (ἀγάπη), the highest form of love described in the New Testament. One NDEr wrote: "I was loved unconditionally despite my faults and fears." Another reported: "Powerful unconditional love and it is a feeling of just knowing what it is. I felt like I was a sinner and I was amazed that He would show me love like that despite my mistakes in life."⁴

John Burke, in Imagine Heaven, compiled hundreds of NDE accounts from around the world that consistently describe this same overwhelming love. Burke emphasized that this love is not a vague, impersonal warmth. It is intensely personal. The being of light knows the NDEr completely — every thought, every failing, every hidden shame — and loves them totally. One woman described it as being "bathed in love" — a brightness she didn't just see but felt, something that felt like home.⁵

Michael Sabom's Atlanta Study confirmed the same findings from a carefully controlled medical perspective. His cardiac arrest patients who had NDEs overwhelmingly reported encountering a being of profound love and compassion.⁶ Bobby Jean, one of Sabom's study participants, described encountering a figure she immediately recognized as Jesus: "He had the most kind, loving look you've ever seen. He began to speak to me, not verbally but through his eyes. I knew what he was saying and he was telling me how much he loved me. I felt it so strongly." Bobby Jean added, "I had never felt that kind of love before, ever."⁷

What makes this finding so striking is who reports it. It is not just devout Christians who encounter this love. Atheists encounter it. Non-Christians encounter it. People living in serious moral failure encounter it. The being of light does not seem to discriminate based on the person's belief system or moral track record. He simply radiates love.

Miller asked a penetrating question about this: if NDErs simply saw what they expected, then why don't they? Wouldn't the person who hates God for allowing a loved one to die expect a despicable, uncaring deity? Wouldn't someone who grew up hearing about a stern, hellfire-and-brimstone God expect judgment and condemnation? Wouldn't the convinced atheist expect either nothing or an impersonal force? And yet, across the board, NDErs encounter the same thing — a deeply personal Being of overwhelming love.⁸

The Biblical Response: Jesus Was Always Loving Toward Sinners

So how should we understand this? Is there really a tension between the loving God of NDEs and the God of the Bible? I don't think so. I think the tension is between the loving God of NDEs and a distorted caricature of the God of the Bible — a caricature that some Christians have unfortunately adopted.

Let me walk you through the Gospel evidence.

Jesus Ate with Tax Collectors and Sinners

One of the most remarkable things about Jesus' earthly ministry is who He chose to spend His time with. Matthew records that Jesus sat down to eat at Matthew's house — a tax collector's house — surrounded by "many tax collectors and sinners" (Matthew 9:10). In the ancient world, sharing a meal was an act of fellowship and acceptance. The Pharisees were scandalized. "Why does your teacher eat with tax collectors and sinners?" they demanded (Matthew 9:11). Jesus' answer was stunning in its simplicity:

"Those who are well have no need of a physician, but those who are sick. Go and learn what this means: 'I desire mercy, and not sacrifice.' For I came not to call the righteous, but sinners." (Matthew 9:12–13, ESV)

The Greek word for "sinners" here is hamartōloi (ἁμαρτωλοί) — people recognized in Jewish society as living outside the bounds of God's law. And Jesus didn't just tolerate these people. He sought them out. He ate with them. He entered their homes. Luke makes this even more explicit: "Now the tax collectors and sinners were all drawing near to hear him. And the Pharisees and the scribes grumbled, saying, 'This man receives sinners and eats with them'" (Luke 15:1–2, ESV).

Think about what this means. The God of the universe, walking in human flesh, deliberately chose to surround Himself with people the religious establishment considered morally and spiritually unclean. He did not do this because their sin didn't matter. He did it because they mattered. He came for the sick, not the healthy.

The Woman Caught in Adultery

Consider how Jesus treated the woman caught in the act of adultery — a woman dragged before Him by men who wanted to use her as a theological test case (John 8:1–11). Under the Mosaic law, she could be stoned. The religious leaders asked Jesus to render judgment. Instead, He knelt down and wrote in the dirt. Then He said, "Let him who is without sin among you be the first to throw a stone at her" (John 8:7, ESV). One by one, the accusers walked away. And then came the remarkable exchange:

"Jesus stood up and said to her, 'Woman, where are they? Has no one condemned you?' She said, 'No one, Lord.' And Jesus said, 'Neither do I condemn you; go, and from now on sin no more.'" (John 8:10–11, ESV)

Notice two things here. First, Jesus did not condemn her. Second, He did not pretend her sin didn't matter — "go, and from now on sin no more." His love was unconditional, but it was not indifferent. He loved her enough to call her away from what was destroying her. This is exactly the pattern we see in NDEs: overwhelming love, combined with a life review that gently but powerfully shows the person the moral reality of their actions (as explored in Chapter 15).

The Woman at the Well

The Samaritan woman at the well had been married five times and was living with a man who was not her husband (John 4:7–26). By any standard, her life was a mess. And she was a Samaritan — someone a devout Jew would not normally speak to. Yet Jesus initiated the conversation, treated her with dignity, and offered her "living water." Miller makes an incisive observation about this encounter: Jesus didn't yell at her or threaten her with hell. He spoke to her with respect. Why would it seem odd, then, that God would show Himself as love to people during the traumatic events that trigger NDEs — heart attacks, serious accidents, medical crises?⁹

Weeping Over Jerusalem

Perhaps the most poignant revelation of Jesus' heart toward sinners comes in Luke 19:41–44, where Jesus approaches Jerusalem — the city that would reject Him and hand Him over to be crucified — and weeps:

"And when he drew near and saw the city, he wept over it, saying, 'Would that you, even you, had known on this day the things that make for peace! But now they are hidden from your eyes.'" (Luke 19:41–42, ESV)

The Greek word for "wept" here is eklausen (ἔκλαυσεν) — He broke down and cried openly. This is not a God who takes pleasure in condemnation. This is a God whose heart breaks when people turn away from Him. NDErs who encounter a being of overwhelming compassion are encountering precisely this God — the God who weeps over those who reject His love.

The Only People Jesus Was Harsh With

There is one group that Jesus consistently confronted with strong language: the self-righteous religious leaders. "Woe to you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites!" (Matthew 23:13, ESV). He called them "whitewashed tombs" (Matthew 23:27), "blind guides" (Matthew 23:16), and a "brood of vipers" (Matthew 23:33). Why? Because they used religion as a weapon to burden others while neglecting mercy and justice (Matthew 23:23). They judged others while being blind to their own failures.

This is a striking pattern. The sinners — the tax collectors, the prostitutes, the adulterers — received compassion. The self-righteous received rebuke. And this is perfectly consistent with what we find in NDEs. The being of light radiates love, not condemnation. The life review shows people their failures, but gently — like a loving parent helping a child understand, not like a judge delivering a sentence.

The Critical Point: An NDE Is Not Final Death

This is the single most important point in this entire chapter, and I want to make sure we don't miss it. An NDE is not the person's final death. The person is coming back. They are being sent back to earthly life, with time and opportunity ahead of them to respond to what they experienced.

This distinction changes everything. Miller puts it perfectly: "NDEs are a half-time event in people's lives, experiencing the other side, but not life after the final judgment."¹⁰ The Bible never says that hell, judgment, or the throne room of God will be experienced by everyone who undergoes a temporary death. The Bible never states that every wicked person who has a near-death experience should encounter hell, any more than it teaches that only Christians can glimpse heaven and angels during such events.¹¹

Think about it this way. During Jesus' earthly ministry, He interacted with all kinds of sinful people — and most of those interactions were characterized by love, patience, and invitation. Why? Because they were still alive. They still had time. The kindness of God was leading them toward repentance (Romans 2:4). The same principle applies to NDEs. The NDEr is not at the final judgment. They are being given a glimpse of the other side while they still have earthly life ahead of them. Of course the encounter is dominated by love — because the purpose is invitation, not sentencing.

As we explored in Chapter 19's treatment of afterlife geography, there is a critical biblical distinction between Hadēs (ᾅδης) — the intermediate state — and Geenna (γέεννα), or the Lake of Fire — the final state of the irredeemably wicked after the last judgment.¹² The final judgment described in Revelation 20:11–15 has not yet occurred. No one is currently experiencing the final state. NDErs — whether they have positive or distressing experiences — are visiting the intermediate state, not the final destination. They are seeing a preview, not the finished picture.

Miller draws a helpful comparison. God "is kind to ungrateful and evil men" (Luke 6:35). He "causes His sun to rise on the evil and the good" (Matthew 5:45). If God is kind to the wicked during their earthly lives — providing rain, sunshine, food, beauty, and countless blessings to people who spit in His face — then why would we expect Him to suddenly become harsh during a near-death experience, which is essentially another moment within the person's ongoing earthly life?¹³

The Analogy of the Hospital Room

Let me offer an analogy that I find helpful. Imagine a child has been in a terrible car accident. He's rushed to the hospital. On the operating table, his heart stops. The medical team works frantically and brings him back. When the child opens his eyes, his mother is standing over him.

Does the mother immediately lecture him about wearing his seatbelt? Does she scold him for running a red light? Does she deliver a stern warning about the consequences of reckless driving?

Of course not. She embraces him. She weeps with relief. She tells him she loves him. She holds him and doesn't want to let go. The conversation about seatbelts and responsible driving will come — but later. After the crisis has passed. After the child has recovered. After the immediate moment of overwhelming relief and love has been expressed.

NDEs are the moment of resuscitation — the embrace of relief and love. The conversation about ultimate accountability comes later, at the final judgment. It would be strange — even cruel — for a loving parent to open with a lecture in the emergency room. And it would be equally strange for a loving God to open with condemnation during a near-death experience, when the person is about to be sent back to life with an opportunity to change.

God's Love Is the Motivation for Judgment, Not Its Opposite

Some Christians make the mistake of thinking that love and judgment are opposites — that a God who loves cannot also judge, or that a God who judges cannot truly love. But the Bible presents them as two sides of the same coin. God judges because He loves.

Think about a doctor who discovers cancer in a patient. If the doctor loves the patient, what does she do? She confronts the cancer. She recommends surgery, chemotherapy, whatever is needed. Not because she hates the patient — but because she loves the patient too much to let the cancer destroy them. A doctor who "lovingly" ignores the cancer and says, "I'm sure it will be fine," is not being loving at all. She is being negligent.

God's love and God's judgment serve the same purpose: the rescue and restoration of the beloved. As I explore at length in my companion work, The Heart of God, God is not a distant, emotionless deity. He has genuine emotional responses to His creatures. He is qualified in His passibility — meaning that He genuinely feels, genuinely cares, and is genuinely affected by what happens to us.¹⁴ His love is not abstract. It is passionate, personal, and deeply invested. And that passionate love is precisely why He will not allow evil to continue forever unchecked.

The God encountered in NDEs — radiating overwhelming love — is not a God who doesn't care about sin. He is a God who cares about sinners too much to leave them where they are. And because the NDE is a temporary event — the person is going back — the appropriate divine response is the response we see: love, invitation, and the gentle but powerful revelation of the life review (discussed in detail in Chapter 15), which shows the person exactly what their life looks like from God's perspective. As Miller observes, since God allows NDErs in their life reviews to see their good and bad deeds clearly, often through the eyes of the people they've helped or hurt, "we naturally judge ourselves. Why would God additionally need to yell at us or threaten us once we've gotten the point?"¹⁵

The Parables of the Lost: Heaven's Joy Over One Sinner

No passage in all of Scripture reveals God's heart toward sinners more powerfully than Luke 15 — the trilogy of parables that Jesus told in response to the Pharisees' complaint that He "receives sinners and eats with them" (Luke 15:2). These three parables form the theological backbone of this chapter, because they explain why the God encountered in NDEs is overwhelmingly loving toward sinners. Let me walk through each one.

The Lost Sheep (Luke 15:3–7)

"What man of you, having a hundred sheep, if he has lost one of them, does not leave the ninety-nine in the open country, and go after the one that is lost, until he finds it? And when he has found it, he lays it on his shoulders, rejoicing. And when he comes home, he calls together his friends and his neighbors, saying to them, 'Rejoice with me, for I have found my sheep that was lost.' Just so, I tell you, there will be more joy in heaven over one sinner who repents than over ninety-nine righteous persons who need no repentance." (Luke 15:4–7, ESV)

Notice what the shepherd does. He doesn't stay home and wait for the sheep to wander back. He doesn't stand at the gate and yell. He goes after the lost sheep — actively, deliberately, persistently — "until he finds it." And when he finds it, he doesn't scold the sheep for wandering off. He puts it on his shoulders and rejoices.

The Greek word for "rejoicing" here is chairōn (χαίρων) — a present participle indicating ongoing, active joy. The shepherd is not irritated or disappointed. He is genuinely, deeply happy. And then Jesus delivers the theological punchline: heaven itself erupts with joy over a single sinner who repents.

This is the God of NDEs. A God who actively seeks the lost. A God who goes after wandering people — even when they haven't asked to be found. A God whose first response to the lost is not anger but joy at the possibility of their return.

The Lost Coin (Luke 15:8–10)

"Or what woman, having ten silver coins, if she loses one coin, does not light a lamp and sweep the house and seek diligently until she finds it? And when she has found it, she calls together her friends and neighbors, saying, 'Rejoice with me, for I have found the coin that I had lost.' Just so, I tell you, there is joy before the angels of God over one sinner who repents." (Luke 15:8–10, ESV)

The same theme appears again. The woman searches diligently — the Greek epizēteō (ἐπιζητέω) carries a sense of intense, focused searching — until she finds it. And again, the outcome is not anger at the coin for being lost, but celebration at its recovery. Notice also that the joy is "before the angels of God" — enōpion tōn angelōn tou Theou (ἐνώπιον τῶν ἀγγέλων τοῦ Θεοῦ). God Himself is rejoicing in the presence of His angels.

If God's characteristic response to the lost being found is joy, then why would we expect NDErs — people who are at the threshold of death and being invited back to life — to encounter anything other than love and joy?

The Lost Son (Luke 15:11–32)

The climax of the trilogy is the parable of the prodigal son — and it is perhaps the most profound revelation of God's heart in all of Scripture.

"And he arose and came to his father. But while he was still a long way off, his father saw him and felt compassion, and ran and embraced him and kissed him. And the son said to him, 'Father, I have sinned against heaven and before you. I am no longer worthy to be called your son.' But the father said to his servants, 'Bring quickly the best robe, and put it on him, and put a ring on his hand, and shoes on his feet. And bring the fattened calf and kill it, and let us eat and celebrate. For this my son was dead, and is alive again; he was lost, and is found.' And they began to celebrate." (Luke 15:20–24, ESV)

This is breathtaking. The father — representing God — does not wait for the son to arrive. He does not demand an explanation. He does not stand at the door with his arms folded, waiting for an apology. He runs to his son. The Greek word edramen (ἔδραμεν) — "he ran" — is extraordinary. In the ancient Near East, a dignified patriarch did not run. Running was considered undignified for an elder. But this father throws aside his dignity because his love is greater than his reputation. He runs, embraces, and kisses his son before any confession or repentance.

Burke highlights this as the heart of God. Jesus told this story to religious leaders who were offended that He associated with sinners. His message is unmistakable: God is not waiting for sinners to clean themselves up before He will love them. He runs toward them. He embraces them in their mess. He celebrates their return.¹⁶

This is what NDErs experience. The God who runs toward sinners with open arms. The God who doesn't wait for them to deserve His love. The God whose first response is not rebuke but embrace. NDEs may be showing us this heart in action — the father running toward the returning child, overwhelmed with compassion and joy.

"God's Kindness Leads to Repentance"

There is a verse that I think unlocks this entire discussion. Romans 2:4 says:

"Or do you presume on the riches of his kindness and forbearance and patience, not knowing that God's kindness is meant to lead you to repentance?" (Romans 2:4, ESV)

The Greek here is powerful. The word for "kindness" is chrēstotēs (χρηστότης) — a word that conveys goodness, generosity, and benevolence. And Paul says this kindness has a purpose: it leads (agei, ἄγει — "is leading") people toward repentance. The present tense suggests an ongoing, continuous process. God's kindness is always at work, always drawing people toward Him.

Miller makes a compelling case from this verse. If God's end game is to gather people in heaven who love Him for who He is, then it makes sense that He would primarily show people His essence — which is love. Threatening people with punishment may produce fear-based compliance, but it doesn't produce genuine love. A dictator can force his citizens to obey, but he cannot force them to love him. God wants love that is freely given, not coerced. And so He leads with kindness — because kindness, not threats, is what produces genuine repentance and genuine love.¹⁷

Miller counted 788 occurrences of "love" in the Bible, compared to 14 occurrences of "hell." Both are real. Both matter. But the emphasis is overwhelmingly on love — and the NDEs reflect this emphasis perfectly.¹⁸

But Some People Do Experience Judgment

At this point, someone might object: "Doesn't this mean NDEs are all sweetness and light? Doesn't this mean nobody ever encounters anything negative?" Not at all. As we explored in detail in Chapter 21, distressing NDEs are real and well-documented.

Barbara Rommer, in her study of 300 NDEs, identified a category of distressing experiences where "the person often feels he is judged by a higher power that causes an overwhelming feeling of guilt."¹⁹ One NDEr in this category put it plainly: "God judged me in that life review. He humbled me to my knees. It was designed to wake me up."²⁰

This is an important nuance. Not every NDEr encounters only love. Some encounter judgment. Some encounter distressing, even terrifying elements. Rommer's conclusion was insightful: people seem to get the experience they need.²¹ Some people respond to gentle love. Others need a more forceful wake-up call. We see this same principle at work in parenting — some children break down in tears when lovingly confronted about their behavior, while others need a firmer approach. Miller observes that God seems to accommodate to these differences, providing each person with the experience most likely to lead them toward genuine transformation.²²

And here is the remarkable thing about distressing NDEs: they consistently produce positive transformation. As we explored in Chapter 21, researcher Nancy Evans Bush found that seeking is the primary outcome of distressing NDEs.²³ Kimberly Clark Sharp observed that "all the people I know who have had negative experiences have become Bible-based Christians."²⁴ Rommer documented numerous cases where distressing NDEs led to dramatic repentance and conversion.²⁵ Whether God uses love or severity, the goal is the same: to draw people toward Himself.

The Objection: "Does This Mean People Can Live However They Want?"

The most common objection I encounter is this: "If God is going to show love to everyone during an NDE regardless of how they lived, doesn't that mean people can live however they want and still expect a warm welcome when they die?"

This objection fails for four reasons.

First, not all NDEs are positive. As we just discussed, some people have deeply distressing experiences. The data does not support the claim that everyone encounters nothing but sweetness and light at the threshold of death.

Second, the life review is not a free pass. As we examined in detail in Chapter 15, the life review confronts people with the moral consequences of their actions in an extraordinarily powerful way — they feel the pain they caused and the joy they gave, from the perspective of the people they affected. People come back from life reviews profoundly humbled, often deeply ashamed of how they lived. This is not moral indifference. It is intense moral accountability — but it is communicated through love, not condemnation.²⁶

Third, an NDE is a temporary event. The final judgment remains ahead. Nothing about the experience of love during a near-death event changes the reality of what Scripture teaches about ultimate accountability. As Paul writes, "we must all appear before the judgment seat of Christ, so that each one may receive what is due for what he has done in the body, whether good or evil" (2 Corinthians 5:10, ESV). Burke makes this point clearly: "The life review is not either of these judgments [the acceptance judgment or the rewards judgment]. It is simply a clarifying reminder that God knows everything about us, and we will all one day give an account."²⁷

Fourth — and this is critical — the overwhelming effect of encountering God's love in NDEs is not complacency. It is transformation. Let me show you what the research actually demonstrates.

The Aftereffects: Love Produces Transformation, Not Complacency

If God's love in NDEs were producing moral complacency — if people came back from NDEs saying, "God doesn't care how I live, so I'm going to do whatever I want" — that would be troubling. But the research shows the exact opposite.

Sabom's Atlanta Study is the most carefully controlled investigation of NDE aftereffects available. He interviewed his cardiac arrest patients using standardized questionnaires and compared NDErs with a control group of cardiac patients who had not experienced an NDE. The results were striking.²⁸

The NDEs consistently deepened the experiencers' intrinsic faith — the kind of faith that is genuine, internalized, and practiced regardless of social pressure. Their overall score on the Hoge Intrinsic Religious Motivation Scale was 31.5, significantly higher than that of Sabom's non-NDE cardiac patients.²⁹ Their capacity for love increased. Their involvement with family increased — forty percent reporting a strong increase and another forty percent reporting some increase. Their sense of meaning in life deepened. Their materialism decreased. Their concern for others grew.³⁰

Most tellingly for our purposes, Sabom investigated whether NDErs moved away from traditional Christianity toward New Age beliefs — a concern frequently raised by Christian critics. They did not. Sabom concluded that "a belief in reincarnation and in Eastern, universalist religion is not a direct aftereffect of near-death experience."³¹ Of the four NDErs in his study who made changes in their Christian belief system, all changed "to a more conservative Christian doctrine."³²

Penny Sartori found the same pattern in her UK hospital study: "All patients reported an increased tendency to pray, go to church, and read the Bible."³³

This is what happens when people encounter God's genuine love. They don't become complacent. They become more compassionate, more generous, more spiritually serious, and more deeply committed to the things that actually matter. They come back from NDEs with their priorities radically reordered — less focused on money, success, and material achievement, and more focused on love, relationships, and service to others. Exactly the kind of fruit the Bible says a genuine encounter with God should produce.

"I Have No Pleasure in the Death of the Wicked"

The Old Testament prophet Ezekiel gives us one of the most direct windows into God's heart toward sinners. God speaks through the prophet with unmistakable clarity:

"Say to them, As I live, declares the Lord GOD, I have no pleasure in the death of the wicked, but that the wicked turn from his way and live; turn back, turn back from your evil ways, for why will you die, O house of Israel?" (Ezekiel 33:11, ESV)

Notice the urgency. The Hebrew word shuvu (שׁוּבוּ) — "turn back" — is repeated twice for emphasis. God is not calmly issuing a policy statement. He is pleading. He is imploring. The repetition conveys the emotional intensity of a God who desperately wants people to choose life rather than destruction. And the opening phrase — "As I live" — is a divine oath, the strongest possible guarantee. God swears by His own existence that He takes no pleasure in judgment.

Peter echoes this in the New Testament: "The Lord is not slow to fulfill his promise as some count slowness, but is patient toward you, not wishing that any should perish, but that all should reach repentance" (2 Peter 3:9, ESV). The Greek boulomenos (βουλόμενος) — "wishing" or "desiring" — expresses a genuine divine desire. God does not merely permit people to repent. He actively desires their repentance. He is patient precisely because He is waiting for them to turn.

When NDErs encounter a God who radiates love rather than condemnation, they are encountering the God of Ezekiel 33:11 and 2 Peter 3:9 — a God whose deepest desire is restoration, not destruction. This is not some watered-down, sentimental deity. This is the God who swears by His own name that He wants the wicked to live.

The Testimony of NDErs: Love Beyond Description

I want to linger a bit longer on what NDErs actually describe when they talk about encountering God's love, because the testimony itself is powerful evidence that something real is happening. These are not vague, generic descriptions. They are specific, consistent, and often expressed with a sense of desperation — as if human language simply cannot capture what the person experienced.

Long's God Study collected hundreds of narrative descriptions. One NDEr reported: "I felt God as an all-encompassing presence — complete, total, and unconditional love in its highest form! I was surrounded by God's unconditional love, which was so much greater than human love."³⁸ Another said: "No human can ever love with the love I felt in that light. It is all-consuming, all-forgiving. Nothing matches it. It is like the day you looked into the eyes of your child for the first time magnified a million times."³⁹

What strikes me about these descriptions is the consistent use of superlatives and comparisons. NDErs don't simply say "I felt loved." They say, "I felt a love beyond anything I have ever experienced." They compare it to the most intense love they know — a mother's love for her newborn child — and then say it was a million times more powerful. They use words like "all-consuming," "all-forgiving," "indescribable." And they often weep when trying to recount it, because they know their words are inadequate.

This kind of testimony is remarkably consistent whether the NDEr is a devout Christian, a nominal believer, an atheist, or someone from a completely different religious background. Long's research confirmed this: among the 420 qualifying NDEs in his study, the descriptions of divine love were "remarkably consistent" regardless of the experiencer's prior religious affiliation.⁴⁰ As Long noted, people from every walk of life — physicians, scientists, homemakers, children, pastors — come from varied backgrounds yet share strikingly similar descriptions of encountering God and the divine.⁴¹

This consistency is difficult to explain if NDEs are merely hallucinations shaped by cultural expectations. If people were simply projecting their own beliefs, we would expect a Hindu to encounter an impersonal Brahman, a Buddhist to encounter the void, an atheist to encounter nothing, and a Christian to encounter Jesus. But instead, across all backgrounds, NDErs encounter a personal being of overwhelming love. The experience transcends the experiencer's theological framework — and often challenges it.

"A Friend of Sinners"

There is a title that Jesus' critics gave Him — meant as an insult — that actually reveals something profoundly important about His character. Matthew records: "The Son of Man came eating and drinking, and they say, 'Look at him! A glutton and a drunkard, a friend of tax collectors and sinners!'" (Matthew 11:19, ESV).

The Pharisees meant this as a slander. But Jesus did not deny it. In fact, the title is theologically significant. The Greek philos (φίλος) — "friend" — describes a relationship of genuine affection, loyalty, and mutual regard. Jesus was not merely tolerant of sinners. He was their friend. He genuinely liked being around them. He enjoyed their company. He sought them out.

Think about what it means to be someone's friend. A friend is someone who knows you — including your faults — and chooses to be with you anyway. A friend is someone who wants what is best for you. A friend is someone who will tell you the truth, but will do it with love rather than contempt. A friend does not abandon you when you fail.

This is the Jesus encountered in NDEs. Not a distant judge peering down from a throne. Not an angry deity waiting to punish. A friend. Someone who knows everything about the NDEr — including the worst — and radiates warmth and acceptance and love. Miller observed that the God of NDEs is consistently described as "so attractive that they never want to leave Him, whose overwhelming characteristic is unfathomable love."⁴² That is what friendship with God looks like.

Sabom's research provides a remarkable case that illustrates this point. Bobby Jean, a woman who had attempted suicide, encountered Jesus during her NDE. She had been convinced by the devil, she later said, that she was no longer able to love and care for her four-year-old son. But during her NDE, she encountered a Jesus who communicated love through His eyes — "telling me how much he loved me." Following her NDE, Bobby Jean's capacity for love was reignited. She recovered, remarried, and in the subsequent thirty-two years had no further suicide attempts. Her Life Changes Questionnaire showed strong increases in her capacity-for-love items.⁴³ A woman who had been convinced she was beyond love encountered the Friend of sinners — and was restored.

Sabom's Theological Analysis: Was It Really Jesus?

An important question arises here: when NDErs identify the being of light as "Jesus," are they really encountering the historical Jesus of Nazareth — the risen, glorified Christ? Sabom addresses this question with characteristic care and rigor.

In his Atlanta Study, Sabom found that "Jesus" was the figure most commonly identified during NDEs after "God." The identification was consistently described as intuitive — immediate, certain, and not requiring deliberation. Dr. George Ritchie, whose NDE in 1943 was influential enough that Raymond Moody dedicated Life After Life to him, described it this way: "The instant I perceived Him, I got to my feet, and as I did came the stupendous certainty: 'You are in the presence of the Son of God.' It was a kind of knowing, immediate and complete."⁴⁴

Sabom noted that across multiple cases, three features were consistently present: (1) the figure appeared as a "man made of light" or a figure radiating brilliant light; (2) the figure was intuitively and immediately identified as Jesus without any deliberation or uncertainty; and (3) the emotional response was one of overwhelming, unconditional love unlike anything the experiencer had previously known.⁴⁵

Sabom raised the theological question with appropriate caution. Was this truly the risen Christ, or could it be something else? He rightly noted that during an NDE, the experiencer is operating within what he called a "general revelation of God" — a broad divine encounter that is not identical to the specific, propositional revelation of Scripture. The identification of the being as "Jesus" is the NDEr's interpretation, and it could potentially be mistaken. As we discuss in Chapter 25, Satan can disguise himself as an angel of light (2 Corinthians 11:14), and discernment is always necessary.⁴⁶

Nevertheless, when the identification is accompanied by Christlike character (love, holiness, truth, compassion), Christlike fruit in the experiencer's life (repentance, deeper faith, increased love, decreased selfishness), and consistency with the biblical description of Jesus, there are strong reasons to believe the encounter is genuine. As I argue in detail in Chapter 29, the biblical framework for testing spiritual experiences gives us clear criteria — and many NDE encounters with Jesus pass these tests convincingly.

Understanding "Nonjudgmental" — What NDErs Actually Mean

One source of confusion is the word "nonjudgmental." Many NDErs describe the being of light as "nonjudgmental," and some Christians hear this as meaning that God doesn't care about sin. But Miller offers an important clarification about what NDErs actually mean when they say this.³⁴

In the life review, people clearly see their good and bad deeds. They feel the impact of their actions on others with excruciating clarity. They recognize — often with deep shame — exactly where they succeeded and failed. What they mean by "nonjudgmental" is that God did not scream at them, threaten them, or heap condemnation on top of what they were already experiencing. He showed them the truth and let the truth speak for itself. Since God made it intuitively obvious where they had failed, there was no need for Him to additionally yell at them about it.

This is not the absence of moral evaluation. It is the presence of moral evaluation — communicated through love rather than rage. And it matches the biblical picture perfectly. God is "slow to anger and abounding in steadfast love" (erek appayim werav-chesed, אֶרֶךְ אַפַּיִם וְרַב־חֶסֶד, Exodus 34:6). He "does not deal with us according to our sins, nor repay us according to our iniquities" (Psalm 103:10, ESV). He desires "that all should reach repentance" (2 Peter 3:9, ESV). This is not a God who ignores sin. This is a God who is patient with sinners because He longs for their restoration.

God's Love Across Religious Lines — Why It Makes Sense

Perhaps the most challenging aspect of the NDE data for some Christians is that non-Christians — Hindus, Muslims, Buddhists, atheists, people with no religious affiliation at all — also encounter this love. Shouldn't God reserve His love for His own people?

But this objection misunderstands both God's character and the nature of the NDE. Let me offer several observations.

First, common grace is a well-established biblical principle. God sends rain on the just and the unjust (Matthew 5:45). He is kind to ungrateful and evil people (Luke 6:35). His general kindness toward all humanity is not an accident or a mistake — it is an expression of His character. If God provides physical blessings to all people regardless of their spiritual state, why would we expect Him to withhold His love from people who are encountering Him at the threshold of death?

Second, remember that an NDE is not the final death. The person is going back. They will have time to respond to what they experienced. Encountering God's love during an NDE does not guarantee salvation, any more than experiencing God's kindness through sunshine and food guarantees salvation. It is an invitation, not a verdict.

Third, Jesus appeared to Saul of Tarsus — who was not a Christian at the time but was actively persecuting Christians (Acts 9:1–9). Jesus' appearance to Saul did not mean that Saul's persecutory beliefs were acceptable. It was the means by which Jesus drew Saul to Himself. Similarly, when non-Christians encounter the love of God during an NDE, this does not validate their prior theology. It may, however, be one of the means by which God is drawing them toward truth — as explored more fully in Chapter 23's discussion of postmortem opportunity.

Fourth, the fact that non-Christians encounter God's love does not mean that "all religions are equal" or that doctrine doesn't matter. As we will explore in detail in Chapter 27, the experience of God's love is one thing; the theological conclusions NDErs draw from that experience are quite another. Many NDErs return saying, "God loves everyone, so all religions must be the same." But this conclusion does not follow from the experience itself. A parent can love all of her children equally while still insisting they take their medicine. Unconditional love does not equal indifference to truth.³⁵

God's Love and the Intermediate State

An important theological clarification is in order here. As we discussed in Chapter 19, the biblical picture of the afterlife includes multiple stages. There is the intermediate state — the period between a person's death and the final judgment — and there is the final state, which is inaugurated at the last judgment (Revelation 20:11–15). NDErs are not visiting the final state. They are having a brief encounter with the intermediate realm, and then they are being sent back to earthly life.

This means that the love NDErs encounter does not necessarily tell us what the final state will be like for the unrepentant. It tells us something true and important about God's character — He is love (1 John 4:8). But it does not tell us that this love will prevent ultimate accountability. A mother who loves her child deeply may still allow that child to experience the consequences of terrible choices. Love does not mean the absence of consequences. It means the consequences are motivated by care, not cruelty.

Burke captures this distinction beautifully. When near-death researchers proclaim that there is no judgment because of the life review, they don't understand what the Scriptures reveal. But also — and this is equally important — when Christians say that NDEs can't be of God because NDErs don't face judgment, they also misunderstand the Scriptures. There is no final judgment until the story of earth is complete and human history, as we know it, ends.³⁶

Jesus Himself made this point. "God sent his Son into the world not to judge the world, but to save the world through him" (John 3:17, ESV). The purpose of Jesus' first coming was salvation, not judgment. Judgment comes later. And NDEs — like the earthly life of Jesus — belong to the era of invitation, not the era of final sentencing.

What About the Being of Light's "Total Knowledge"?

One of the most fascinating aspects of the NDE encounter is that the being of light seems to know everything about the experiencer. Every thought. Every secret. Every failure. Every hidden shame. And yet the being's response to this total knowledge is not revulsion or condemnation — it is love.

This matches the biblical picture precisely. The Psalmist writes:

"O LORD, you have searched me and known me! You know when I sit down and when I rise up; you discern my thoughts from afar. You search out my path and my lying down and are acquainted with all my ways. Even before a word is on my tongue, behold, O LORD, you know it altogether." (Psalm 139:1–4, ESV)

God knows everything. And yet knowing everything does not make Him love us less. In fact, one of the most powerful aspects of the NDE encounter is the realization that God sees the worst in us and still loves us. This is the essence of agapē love — love that is not based on the worthiness of the recipient. "God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us" (Romans 5:8, ESV). He didn't wait until we were lovable. He loved us at our worst.

NDErs who encounter this total-knowledge-plus-unconditional-love are not encountering something unbiblical. They are encountering the very heart of the gospel.

The Zephaniah Connection: A God Who Rejoices

There is one more passage I want to highlight, because it connects the NDE data to a beautiful but often-overlooked dimension of God's character. The prophet Zephaniah writes:

"The LORD your God is in your midst, a mighty one who will save; he will rejoice over you with gladness; he will quiet you by his love; he will exult over you with loud singing." (Zephaniah 3:17, ESV)

This is extraordinary. God does not merely tolerate us. He rejoices over us. He exults over us with singing. The Hebrew word for "exult" here is yagil (יָגִיל) — it describes spinning or dancing with joy. And God "quiets" us with His love — the Hebrew yacharish (יַחֲרִשׁ) suggests calming, soothing, stilling our fears.

This is what many NDErs describe — being calmed, soothed, quieted by the overwhelming love of the being of light. All their fear melts away. All their anxiety vanishes. They feel a peace and safety they have never known. And they sense that the being is genuinely joyful in their presence — not dutiful, not obligated, but deeply, authentically glad.

The God encountered in NDEs is the God of Zephaniah 3:17 — a God who exults over His creatures with singing.

Addressing the Universalism Concern

I want to be direct about this. The fact that God shows love to non-Christians during NDEs does not prove universalism — the view that all people will ultimately be saved regardless of their response to God. As I will discuss in the next chapter (Chapter 23), I believe the NDE evidence is consistent with a postmortem opportunity for salvation, but that is a different question from whether everyone will ultimately accept that opportunity.

Here is what the NDE data does and does not show:

It shows that God's character is overwhelmingly loving. It shows that He extends grace and invitation even to those who have not acknowledged Him. It shows that His first impulse toward sinners is compassion, not condemnation. All of this is thoroughly biblical.

But it does not show that everyone will accept God's love. The parable of the prodigal son has two sons. The younger son came home and was received with joy. The older son — who represents the self-righteous religious leaders — refused to join the celebration. The father went out to him and pleaded with him (Luke 15:28), but the parable ends without telling us whether the older son came in. The invitation is extended. But the response is not guaranteed.

Similarly, NDEs show us the invitation. They show us the God who runs toward sinners with open arms. But they do not guarantee that every person who encounters that love will respond with repentance and faith. Some NDErs do come back radically transformed — like Howard Storm, the atheist art professor whose distressing NDE and subsequent rescue by Jesus led to his conversion and eventual ordination, as discussed in Chapter 21.³⁷ Others come back and interpret the experience through a non-Christian lens, drawing conclusions that don't follow from the experience itself (as we will explore in Chapter 26). The love is real. The invitation is genuine. But the human response remains free.

Deathbed Experiences and the Confirmation of God's Love

It is worth noting that the same pattern of overwhelming divine love appears not only in NDEs but also in deathbed experiences (DBEs) — visions and encounters reported by the dying in their final hours and days. As we explored in Chapter 4, DBEs have been documented across cultures and centuries, and they share many features with NDEs. And one of the most consistent features is the sense of being welcomed by a loving presence.

Miller's extensive research into DBEs confirms this. The dying frequently report seeing deceased loved ones who appear healthy, radiant, and welcoming. They often describe a sense of profound peace and love that settles over them as death approaches. Caregivers — nurses, hospice workers, family members — frequently observe visible changes in the dying person: fear gives way to calm, agitation gives way to peace, distress gives way to serenity. Something is happening that the observers cannot see but that the dying person clearly can.⁴⁷

What is theologically significant about DBEs in this context is that they involve people who are dying for real — this is not a temporary cardiac arrest followed by resuscitation. These are people in the final hours and minutes of life. And yet the pattern is the same: overwhelming love, warmth, and welcome. The dying are being received, not rejected. They are being comforted, not condemned.

This reinforces the argument we have been making throughout this chapter. God's love toward the dying and the nearly dead is not a temporary trick or a misleading display. It reflects who God actually is. The shepherd who goes after the lost sheep does not stop being the shepherd when the sheep reaches the edge of the flock. The father who runs toward the returning son does not stop running when the son crosses the property line. God's love is relentless, persistent, and real — and both NDEs and DBEs give us a window into that love in action.

The Love That Transforms: More Evidence from the Research

I want to return once more to the transformative power of encountering God's love in NDEs, because the evidence is so striking and so directly relevant to our question. If encountering God's love made people morally complacent, we would have reason for concern. But the data points overwhelmingly in the opposite direction.

Kenneth Ring's early research documented what he called the "omega prototype" — a consistent set of aftereffects that NDErs experience. These include a dramatic decrease in fear of death, an increase in concern for others, a deepening of spiritual interest, and a decreased interest in material success and social status. Ring found these changes to be robust and long-lasting — they persisted years and even decades after the NDE.⁴⁸

Long's research through NDERF confirmed Ring's findings on a much larger scale. NDErs consistently reported that their experience made them more loving, more compassionate, more patient, and more focused on relationships rather than material achievement. Long observed that the consistency of these transformations across such a diverse population of NDErs was itself powerful evidence that the experiences were encounters with an objective reality — not subjective hallucinations shaped by individual expectations.⁴⁹

And Burke's pastoral observations reinforce the point. Over and over, NDErs return from their experiences and change their priorities. They leave high-paying jobs to enter caring professions. They repair broken relationships. They become more generous. They volunteer more. They pray more. They read the Bible more. In Burke's words, the life review — with its emphasis on love as the supreme value — functions as a powerful motivation for transformation, not complacency.⁵⁰

Why does encountering God's love produce this kind of transformation? I believe it is because genuine love calls forth a response. When someone truly loves you — when you feel seen, known, accepted, and valued at the deepest level — it changes something inside you. You want to live up to that love. You want to pass it on. You want to be worthy of it — not to earn it, because you already know it's freely given, but because the experience of being loved awakens your own capacity to love. Paul understood this: "For the love of Christ controls us, because we have concluded this: that one has died for all, therefore all have died; and he died for all, that those who live might no longer live for themselves but for him who for their sake died and was raised" (2 Corinthians 5:14–15, ESV). The word Paul uses for "controls" is synechei (συνέχει) — it means to hold together, to compel, to constrain. Christ's love doesn't just warm our hearts. It reorganizes our entire lives.

This is exactly what we see in NDErs. The love they encountered doesn't make them passive. It makes them active — active in love, active in service, active in spiritual growth. The love of God in NDEs produces precisely the fruit that the love of God should produce according to the Bible. And that is one of the strongest arguments that what NDErs are encountering is genuinely from God.

Conclusion: The God Who Meets Us With Love

Let me bring together the threads of this chapter.

The concern that many Christians have — that God should be angry rather than loving toward sinners during NDEs — is sincere but misguided. It rests on a misunderstanding of both God's character and the nature of the NDE event.

God's character, as revealed in the Gospels, is overwhelmingly loving toward sinners. Jesus ate with tax collectors. He forgave adulterers. He wept over rebellious Jerusalem. He told parables about a shepherd who leaves the ninety-nine to find the one, about a father who runs to embrace a son who wasted everything. The only people He was harsh with were the self-righteous who used religion as a weapon. The loving God of NDEs is the God of Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John.

An NDE is not the final death. It is a temporary event. The person is being sent back to life with time and opportunity to respond. Just as Jesus was patient with sinners during their earthly lives — calling them, inviting them, extending grace — so He is patient with NDErs who are being returned to life. The kindness of God leads to repentance. Love is the most effective invitation.

God's love and God's judgment are not opposites. God judges because He loves. The doctor who confronts cancer is loving, not cruel. The parent who disciplines a child is caring, not indifferent. The love encountered in NDEs does not cancel future accountability. It sets the stage for it.

The aftereffects confirm this. NDErs who encounter God's love do not come back complacent. They come back transformed — more loving, more compassionate, less materialistic, more spiritually serious. Sabom's Atlanta Study demonstrates that NDEs deepen intrinsic faith and move people toward more conservative Christian practice, not away from it. The fruit is good. And Jesus taught us that good fruit comes from a good tree (Matthew 7:17–18).

The God who meets us at the threshold of death with overwhelming, unconditional love is not a contradiction of the biblical God. He is the biblical God — the God who is love (1 John 4:8), the God who is kind to ungrateful and evil people (Luke 6:35), the God who does not desire the death of the wicked but that they turn and live (Ezekiel 33:11), the God who rejoices over His creatures with singing (Zephaniah 3:17), the God who runs toward returning sinners with open arms (Luke 15:20).

I believe this should not trouble us. It should comfort us. The God who awaits us on the other side is more loving than we dare to imagine — and that love is the most powerful force in the universe for drawing us home.